What a load of crap.

I got it! I finally got it! A load bag of crap! What, you don’t know what I’m talking about? I take it you’re not familiar with woot.com?

So woot.com is the granddaddy of “deal a day” sites. Unlike Groupon and the current crop, they aren’t for services or restaurants, etc., but for goods of one sort or another. For the uninitiated, Woot can be wonderful, or the biggest drain on your wallet since you discovered online shopping. As a result of Woot, in my house right now, I/we have:

And those are only the ones I can remember. While my Woot purchases have dropped off considerably in recent years, I do still like to pop by once in a while to learn about the useless thing I never knew existed that I suddenly can’t live without. And then it happened. I managed to get a Bag of Crap.

If you’re wondering right now, “why would you be so excited about a bag of crap,” you are clearly among the uninitiated. A bag of crap is a semi-mythical item offered by Woot. Bags of Crap have been known to sell out in mere seconds. Why, you might ask, would you want a bag of crap?

Woot is very clear about what to expect as demonstrated by their Commandments:

THE HOLY CRAP COMMANDMENTS v3.0
I. Thou shalt expect nothing beyond ONE bag of some kind and THREE crappy items.
II. Thou shalt not whine and complain when some people’s crap turns out to be nicer than yours.
III. Thou shalt take a moment to consider whether you might be better off just not buying this crap.
IV. Thou shalt not expect better crap just because things are different this time. Crap is crap.
V. To paraphrase Stephen Stills, shalt thou not get the crap you want, want the crap you get.

And yet, the demand for them is just ridiculous. Now in fairness, there are fairly common, potentially apocryphal stories about people who have gotten 42″ flat panel tvs and the like as part of their bags of crap. The possibilities are endless.

Needless to say, when I was able to procure a bag of crap, I was super excited. I just like (certain) surprises. It’s fun. So after more than a week of breathless anticipation, I finally got it. Are you ready?

Building anticipation. Given the size of the box, however, I think a TV might be out of the question though...

Oooooo, the anticipation!

The Full Crap

So what do you think? Did I get a load of crap? Or more importantly, did I get eight dollars worth of crap?

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